look at it this way

here we are on the last day of a tough week. the bad news from two weeks ago put me in the dumps a little bit. i have been fighting a cold/flu/bug the better part of the week. work has been fast and furious.

but in other news there are some real things to be thankful for this week. we did not have a government shut-down this week; and i learned that even if we do in the future, the government will continue to pay our (health) benefits while we are shut down. i also got a call from the oncologist's office early in the week. they told me about the new chemo regime i will be taking starting monday. i will continue on the avastin every other week. i will add the irinotecan IV and take it every other week. and i will also add a new IV chemotherapy drug, carboplatin, and take it once a month. i'm not sure i am officially part of the trial, but this regime mirrors a phase 2 duke trial that has been ongoing for about a year. the best news here is no more temodar! there aren't many pharmacies that supply temodar; the one i use usually calls on the friday before i am to start taking it to confirm the reorder. it felt great to tell them yesterday "no more temodar".

while on the phone with the oncologist i happened to mention that i had been feeling sick with flu-like symptoms. my regular doctor was out this week, so the nurse consulted with another doctor at the clinic. when she called back she said the other doctor recommended getting another MRI before monday's scheduled chemo. another MRI?! i just had one less than three weeks ago. don't you know i am wary, tired, and very busy. yes, they want to ensure things have not slipped and they want to have a baseline for the beginning of the new chemo treatments. i am not doctor, and while i don't see the logic in this, i also see it as a rare opportunity. if God were to heal me of this cancer, how could He do it in a way that would leave no doubt about whether it was done and who did it? if i got better on a new treatment, the doctors could say well praise science. having the MRI on thursday and having clear results from it would leave no doubt. i haven't had any treatments in between the two MRIs (nothing that i haven't been doing for the last year which resulted in two reoccurances), there is nothing the skeptics could point to as being responsible other than God and our prayers to Him.

so this is the way the family and i are praying, that the newest MRI would show healing - healing that can not be explained in any other way than by God Himself. please join me in this prayer of faith. i know not everyone who reads my blog buys into this, and that's okay. hope is not a four-letter-word to me; because there is a God who is there, and He does care for us, and occasionally He does supernaturally intervene in our lives. please pray for strength, wisdom, peace, and the courage to face whatever is next.

thank you all.
john
SDG