last night i dreamed i was walking with my dad in a lush green forest. we were having a discussion about running. it was one of those 'remember when...' type conversations. mostly it was us saying how we wish we still had the energy to run.
tomorrow is good friday. it is the day Jesus suffered on our behalf. sunday is resurrection sunday. it is the day that Jesus defeated death and made possible an end to suffering.
tomorrow is also the end of my regular radiation treatments (not the end of the treatments, just the 'regular' ones). i will have 6 more treatments after that. the doctor tells me the remaining treatments will be 'intense' narrow field reductions of my recised tumor area, as well as a 'focused' radiation of part of the tumor that is attached to the optic nerve of my right eye.
the truth is i don't like to run, i never have. my dad ran cross-country in high school, so maybe i was just placating in my dream, but i don't think our conversation was disingenuous. the truth is also i wish i did have more energy. my body is completely wiped out. by the time i get home each night i can barely walk from the car to the mailbox without being winded.
my prayer for the next two weeks is simply survival. it will be busy, it will be 'intense', it will be 'focused', it will be more than i can handle. my prayer is for strength, my prayer is to know the truth of isaiah 40:28-31.
thank you Jesus for your goodness. thank you for your hope and resurrection. help us to understand.
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Thank you for your updates. It must be very taxing for you. I'm very sorry that you are going through this. I hope that all will be better soon.
ReplyDeleteJohn, Randy and I are praying for you. Our pastor said, the resurrection reminds us to never underestimate God's power. I pray for complete healing by his power.
ReplyDeleteLinda Sewell
Hey - praying for you and sad you are sick, but encouraged to see your faith is strong and to know nothing happens to us without God's permission.
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